Stefanie Silber 2020 Special Award
In her daily life Heike is working as a stonecutter. She loves to work also with felt, creates small cocoon coffins and organizes collective funerals for stillborn babies. 26.2.2018 in Langenhagen, Germany. © Stefanie Silber
Janne-Lilli died in 22th week of pregnancy. She was buried in the family grave. Her parents and father's parents joined the ceremony. On their way to the graveyard a neighbour gave them some flowers as last regards. 10.11.2017 in Hamburg, Germany. © Stefanie Silber
Parents try to capture the first and last footprint of her daughter. She died in 22th week of pregnancy. 8.11.2017 in Hamburg, Germany. © Stefanie Silber
Some communities or hospitals organize collective funerals for stillborn babies as an unpaid service. In a few cities the funerals take place every month, at other places parents have to wait up to 12 months to the next ceremony. Half-a-year ceremony with about 40 families in Hannover, Germany, 26.10.2018. © Stefanie Silber
Portrait of Janne-Lilli, a stillborn girl. She died in 22th week of pregnancy. Her mother crocheted a tiny cap for her. At her funeral both parents wore a colourful cap on their way to the grave. 8.11.2017 in Hamburg, Germany. © Stefanie Silber
Shortly after birth the siblings can sit in their leave-taking of their sister Phine. She died a couple of minutes after birth. The family knew before that she will die but they decided to give her the time of pregnancy as a present. 25.3.2018 in Höxter/Hoexter, Germany. © Stefanie Silber
After having a stillborn baby, Helena is hoping that everything might go well with her next pregnancy. The family moved to a new flat. Their boy will be born healthy some months later. 10.4.2019 in Hannover, Germany. © Stefanie Silber
A group of women meets to sew clothes for stillborn and premature babies as honorary work. There are many sewing groups and hundreds of mostly women allover Germany. Several organizations store the clothes and distribute them without any costs for parents and hospitals. 5.11.2017 in Seevetal, Germany. © Stefanie Silber
Midwife Birgit at her home: 'I like to accompany parents during a stillbirth, you can help them to have a good leave-taking.' Several years she lived in Africa with her family. Just a couple of years ago she finished her apprenticeship as a midwife. 14.3.2018 in Celle, Germany. © Stefanie Silber
Marleen was five years old when her brother Hannes became a stillborn baby. She asked her mother if she can keep the rabbit her mother had crocheted. When she was born her mother did the same to her. The rabbit for her brother has closed eyes, although nobody knew about his short life at that time. As an alternative present for her brother she and her auntie sewed a star. 2.2.2019 in Harz, Germany. © Stefanie Silber
Christening of Charlotte. She is born healthy after the loss of a stillborn boy. 8.3.2020 in Harz, Germany. © Stefanie Silber
21 years after the stillbirth of their daughter Sophie her grave was closed. So the parents took her gravestone home and found a place in their garden. 22.4.2019 in Hamburg, Germany. © Stefanie Silber
Loud Silence
‘You have already a child’, ‘Why are you still sad? Your pregnancy only ended after 12 weeks’, ‘You are young, you can have another one’ are common phrases that often show helplessness. Sometimes it is more helpful to say ‘I don’t have any words.’ Families with stillborn babies know what it feels like to be excluded, to lose friends, to quit or lose their jobs. They know about the loud silence after birth and the loud silence mentioning to others what happened. This work takes place in Germany, but families all over the world are affected. Some couples separate. Others give birth to another child. Some are not able to, mentally or physically. There are still many challenges communities need to speak about. Fortunately, there is also support available.
About the Photographer
Stefanie Silber (b. 1975) is a German documentary photographer. Her work focuses on issues such as trauma, loneliness and grief. She started studying Photojournalism in Hanover in Germany at 39 years old, living her dream after working as a graphic designer and fighting for her right hand after an accident while working for Frankfurter Allgemeine Zeitung. She has been teaching undertakers and since 2020, has been supporting families with stillborn babies. Silber received a BFF Grant in 2018 and undertook a Nikon Masterclass in 2019. Her work has been included in several group exhibitions.